It Seems Like What You’re Teaching Is That If I Want To Make Women Crazy About Me, I Have To Act Like A Total Jerk. Is That Right?
I am not, do not, and have not EVER told ANYONE that the way to get along with people is to be a total jerk.

Never.

No, no, no.

What I DO say is that jerks often create an amazing feeling of ATTRACTION inside of women, and that there are ways that the average guy like you and me can take some of those things that jerks do and use these powerful techniques -- WITHOUT THE ABUSIVE PARTS -- to make women attracted to US instead.

Make no mistake about it, I don't think it's a good idea to act like a jerk to other people. But I DO think it's a GREAT idea to tease women, bust on them, be Cocky & Funny, and play hard to get.
Do You Know Of Any Great Ways To Turn A Woman Who Is A Friend Into A Lover?
I get a TON of e-mails from guys who are looking for the answer to this one “magical” question.

The simple answer is: If you don’t want her to see you as a friend, STOP ACTING LIKE ONE.

Most guys act extra nice around women they’re attracted to -- they smile a lot, act interested in what she’s saying (even if it’s boring as hell), do her favors (pick her up when her car breaks down, feed her cat when she’s away on a trip).

Unfortunately, NONE OF THIS makes her feel ATTRACTION for you; it only makes her see you as a “real nice guy.”

But that’s not exactly what you’re after, is it?

Now, the reason most guys treat a woman they like extra nicely is because they’re AFRAID of doing the things that could build attraction because to do that would mean RISKING REJECTION.

It’s safer to be nice to her because how can she reject you when you’re being nice?

But if you want to turn her from a friend to a lover, acting nice SIMPLY WON’T WORK. You have to do something MORE, and my Cocky & Funny strategies are a great place to start.

Suggest grabbing a cup of tea… and then bust on her playfully. Lean back. Relax.

When you do, she’ll see you as the kind of confident, secure guy she’s after… then SHE will come to YOU.

What’s the protocol for talking to other women after getting a number? What If I Get A Girl’s Number At A Club, But She Later Sees Me Talking To ANOTHER Girl? Won’t This Blow It For Me?
Well, the problem in these types of situations is that most guys don't want to get a woman's number then be seen talking to other women or getting other numbers because they don't want to be seen as "players" or as insincere.

My advice? Get over it.

If you enjoy talking to a woman and you'd like to get her number AND go talk to other people (including other women), just say: "Here, write down your e-mail and number. I'm going to get back to my friends" and DO IT. She’ll actually see you as an “in demand” kind of guy if she sees you talking to other women. Her competition mechanism will kick in, and that will actually AMPLIFY her attraction for you.
Reader’s Question
Hi Dave,

I am 27 and came to Australia three years ago. And, yes, I have the Cocky & Funny attitude. In fact, at the place where I am working I work with eight women, though all above 40. Yet when I talk, they laugh and they have told me that I am the only male that has survived working there.

Yes, I can get any woman to laugh. The first time I read your letter, I was delighted that C&F was a basic instinct of mine.

I study at university. There is a lovely girl and I liked her very much, so I started hanging around her and went on coffee breaks with her twice. One day, she was going out for a beer with friends, so she called me. We had a nice time and at the end she gave me a real big hug. She told me earlier that she has no boyfriend. After a couple of days, I could not resist to tell her how much I liked her, but I could not get her out for coffee, so I recorded a 10-minute message on a tape and gave
it to her.

And BOOM! It was like a nuclear bomb exploded. She stopped talking to me and reported me to the dean.

My question is: How does a man tell when a woman likes him as a friend or as a boyfriend. I am confused! Secondly, was it right to tell her through a tape?

A.K., Australia
My Answer
OK, hold on to your keyboard and mouse because I have some bad news for you...

When you couldn't resist telling her how much you liked her, you demonstrated a very special personality trait that I like to refer to as acting like a WUSSY.

This means that instead of being cool, relaxing, and seeing where things went, you were overcome with emotion and feelings for a girl you didn't even know, and you went overboard and RECORDED A 10-MINUTE TAPE to let her know what a wuss you really are.

She probably enjoyed spending time with you. She may have even been interested in you in a romantic way. But when you go and do something extreme like recording a 10-minute tape and giving it to her, it makes you look like a bizarre fan or stalker.

I have some more bad news for you.

I'm guessing that this woman was ATTRACTIVE. I mean physically attractive. She's probably hot.

Guess what?

For some strange reason, men feel compelled to tell unusually beautiful women things like "I have feelings for you" or "I really, REALLY like you" or "You're special" very early on in a relationship.

And guess what?

They start to think that men are wussies or that they must be crazy, and when they meet another guy who just shares his feelings after the first date, they run for the hills.

You need to lean back. Give women room. Don't see a new woman more than once or twice a week for the first several weeks (ESPECIALLY if she's unusually attractive).

Oh, and stop it with the 10-minute tapes. That's just plain bad news waiting to happen.